Yes You CAN!!!

Yes you can buy these shoes! Carry this purse! Tshirts, jackets, buttons, pins, we got 'em! Line on up, join the patriarchal, democratic, hope laden consumerism!
Just buy the Obama sweatshirt (nevermind that it's summer), the Obama blanket, the Obama posters! Yes you can wall paper your entire living room with our fearless leader's face. He'll look on, hopeful and triumphant, handsome as Adonis, as you watch reruns of "Murder She Wrote".

Yes You CAN! buy these shoes for your toddler. Because your toddler is old enough to read, write, and vote. Your toddler is old enough to understand economic and wartime issues. Your toddler was an intellectual contributor to the grassroots campaign.

YES YOU CAN! buy these shoes that are promoting change! We're going to end the recession with dollars thrown at merchandise capitalizing off of our President's face, eyes, mouth, words, and of course, hope. We're going to change everything by doing something that's never been done before: marketing something or someone that is currently popular.

You can, my good people, you can. Because you are true supporters of the cause. The moment that you saw the commercial on your satellite TV advertising these shoes, you knew you had to have them. These shoes would show everyone how politically aware you are. And every time you bent to tie your shoes, Barack Obama's canvas face would shoot an invisible, powerful beacon of hope straight into your spinal cord, straightening your back so that you can march proudly forward.

Yes you can.

As one of my friends pointed out, it's good that people are proud of their president. And I know this same thing has been going on for a while -- just look at all the anti-Bush merchandise that was and is still available. I just wish that politically aware didn't necessarily mean having to keep up with the latest fashion trend.

A Priest, A Rabbi, and A Man Who Twists Comedy...

While surfing the 'Cartoons and Humor' section of the New York Times' website, an interesting story caught my eye. The full story can be found on Borowitz Report.com.

Saying he is "sympathetic to late night comedians' struggle to find jokes
to make about me," Sen. Barack Obama (D-Ill) today issued a list of official
campaign-approved Barack Obama jokes.

The five jokes, which Sen. Obama said he is making available to all comedians free of charge, are as follows:

Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

A traveling salesman knocks on the door of a farmhouse, and much to his surprise, Barack Obama answers the door. The salesman says, "I was expecting the farmer's daughter." Barack Obama replies, "She's not here. The farm was foreclosed on because of sub prime loans that are making a mockery of the American Dream."

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" Barack Obama replies, "His jockey just lost his health insurance, which should be the right of all Americans."

Q: What's black and white and red all over? Barack Obama: The New Yorker magazine, which should be embarrassed after publishing such a tasteless and offensive cover, which I reject and denounce.

A Christian, a Jew and Barack Obama are in a rowboat in the middle of the ocean. Barack Obama says, "This joke isn't going to work because there's no Muslim in this boat."

On one hand, I can see the humor in these policy jokes. It's refreshing to find a candidate who can make not-so-subtle jabs at comedians stunned reactions. On the other hand, they're not stunned for lack of material. They're stunned because so often this political season, jokes that are made in favor of a candidate are denounced as offensive, and jokes that are meant to be offensive are found humorous.

The best example of this is, of course, the infamous cover of the New Yorker. Personally, I found it funny. Why? Because the New Yorker was making fun of the absurd allegations put forth by emails, hate-mongers, and Fox News, in order to make the public realize how absurd their fear was. And I understand why the Obamas would be so upset. Some people who don't understand satire would view it more as a confirmation of their fears rather than a joke.

But the Obamas should have just said that. "We don't want our persons portrayed in that kind of negative light, linking us with Islamic terrorists". Instead, they said that it was "offensive to Muslim Americans".

No. It's not. Assuming that all Muslims are terrorists is offensive to Muslim Americans. Proposing that having an Islamic president would be a bad thing is offensive to Muslim Americans. A satirical cover making fun of fears based on nothing is not offensive to Muslim Americans.

And I would go off on how stupid the term Muslim American is (I don't insist on being catered to as a Christian American, and I've never heard my nephew assert his rights as an Atheist American), but that's an entirely different rant.