A Whole New Generation of Space Monkeys

What does this remind you of?



Give up?



Ladies and gentlemen, for your midweek enjoyment, I bring you the latest update on what Tyler Durden has been up to.
He's become a scientologist. And apparently he was also very inspired by Barack Obama, because, hey, why else would he have so much hope about the human spirit while writing the script for the scientology commercial?
I must say this is quite a 180 on his outlook on the human population. Apparently, he has decided that everyone is a special and unique snowflake.

Gimme Just a Little Kiss...

This story was so ludicrous that it caught my attention. Every once in a while, "respectable" televised news programs will air a segment that is so beyond trivial that it should be brought to their attention how meaningless it is.

Apparently on Monday, July 28th, The View hosted a pop singer by the name of Katy Perry. She sang her hit "I Kissed a Girl", which along with her song "UR So Gay" has received a lot of criticism on being too controversial for her audience's demographic.

Britney Spears, who at one time was idolized by eight-year-olds, once preformed in a nude-colored catsuit. What could be so controversial?

But what really has critics and conservative parents outraged is that at the end of the performance, Whoopi Goldberg gave Perry a little peck. The kiss in question was on the same level as some European greetings. Yet, according to the ten minute debate that aired on last night's episode of The O'Reilly Factor, this "controversy" shouldn't have been aired by ABC at all, as some parents are concerned that their daughters could be affected by the media's blatant acceptance of experimentation.

If the parents are letting their impressionable daughters watch The View, especially during a performance of a song titled "I Kissed a Girl", and are concerned that a small kiss from Goldberg is going to send their daughters over the homosexual edge, then they should really learn to control what their kids watch. Instead, they make censorship demands, something that should never happen in a society that claims that freedom of speech is a priority. The level of outrage that has occurred over something so minor suggests just how deep homophobic beliefs and feelings run in America.

Also, The O'Reilly Factor could be talking about something more meaningful that a harmless incident that happened on a daytime talk show. But, as I've never been that impressed with Bill O'Reilly, I can't say I'm surprised.

A Priest, A Rabbi, and A Man Who Twists Comedy...

While surfing the 'Cartoons and Humor' section of the New York Times' website, an interesting story caught my eye. The full story can be found on Borowitz Report.com.

Saying he is "sympathetic to late night comedians' struggle to find jokes
to make about me," Sen. Barack Obama (D-Ill) today issued a list of official
campaign-approved Barack Obama jokes.

The five jokes, which Sen. Obama said he is making available to all comedians free of charge, are as follows:

Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

A traveling salesman knocks on the door of a farmhouse, and much to his surprise, Barack Obama answers the door. The salesman says, "I was expecting the farmer's daughter." Barack Obama replies, "She's not here. The farm was foreclosed on because of sub prime loans that are making a mockery of the American Dream."

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" Barack Obama replies, "His jockey just lost his health insurance, which should be the right of all Americans."

Q: What's black and white and red all over? Barack Obama: The New Yorker magazine, which should be embarrassed after publishing such a tasteless and offensive cover, which I reject and denounce.

A Christian, a Jew and Barack Obama are in a rowboat in the middle of the ocean. Barack Obama says, "This joke isn't going to work because there's no Muslim in this boat."

On one hand, I can see the humor in these policy jokes. It's refreshing to find a candidate who can make not-so-subtle jabs at comedians stunned reactions. On the other hand, they're not stunned for lack of material. They're stunned because so often this political season, jokes that are made in favor of a candidate are denounced as offensive, and jokes that are meant to be offensive are found humorous.

The best example of this is, of course, the infamous cover of the New Yorker. Personally, I found it funny. Why? Because the New Yorker was making fun of the absurd allegations put forth by emails, hate-mongers, and Fox News, in order to make the public realize how absurd their fear was. And I understand why the Obamas would be so upset. Some people who don't understand satire would view it more as a confirmation of their fears rather than a joke.

But the Obamas should have just said that. "We don't want our persons portrayed in that kind of negative light, linking us with Islamic terrorists". Instead, they said that it was "offensive to Muslim Americans".

No. It's not. Assuming that all Muslims are terrorists is offensive to Muslim Americans. Proposing that having an Islamic president would be a bad thing is offensive to Muslim Americans. A satirical cover making fun of fears based on nothing is not offensive to Muslim Americans.

And I would go off on how stupid the term Muslim American is (I don't insist on being catered to as a Christian American, and I've never heard my nephew assert his rights as an Atheist American), but that's an entirely different rant.

Happy National Prayer Day!

Now, let me catch you up on some interesting news:

<< This picture is the subject of a Fox News report. A woman saw Jesus in her ultrasound. All I have to ask is...where is the kid? I mean, I see Jesus, but I'm thinking maybe the kid is breached? Head at the bottom, and that's his legs...and his, well, butt where Jesus' head is?

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0%2C2933%2C353230%2C00.html

Erm...anyways.

In other ridiculous news...

Another good reason why Obama should win. Coffee fuels both politics and the media. If Hillary can't get the coffee, then Hillary definitely can't get the votes.
Side note: super delegates don't drink coffee.

This is a pointless post. Mainly because this is pointless news.

Oh, and go see Iron Man!!!

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, PRAY!!! Not just today, too, because you can pray other days besides the National Day of Prayer.